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Having a Beer With Chicago's Best

If you could have a beer with any former or current member of each Chicago sports team, who would you choose?
Crack Um Traditions

If you could have a beer with any former or current member of each Chicago sports team, who would you choose? This question has been burning in my mind for a while now, so I figured it was time to present my top candidates and the reasoning behind each in article form. Without further ado, here goes.

First of all, I need to give an honorable mention to Chicago legends Frank Thomas and Walter Payton. However, I could never pass on an opportunity to have a drink with Michael Jordan. Could you imagine talking with the GOAT about anything you want? I would bring up the three-peats, how he overcame those aliens in Space Jam, and if he was tested for PEDs after drinking Michael's secret stuff, because we all know it wasn’t water. In all seriousness, to be able to talk to a guy who is a popular favorite for being the greatest player to ever pick up a basketball, how did he overcome the denial from being cut from his high school basketball team? Why North Carolina over Duke? Why did he leave for baseball? Sure, you can find all of these answers online, but nothing would beat hearing the emotion in his voice while we’re smoking cigars and polishing our Concord elevens. It would be an absolute treat and a truly unforgettable experience.

Photo: Andrew  Bernstein/Getty Images

Photo: Andrew Bernstein/Getty Images

I have spent a lot of time dwelling over this next one as both a fan and partier, and I couldn’t think of a better candidate to drink with than Chicago Blackhawks forward Patrick Kane. Kaner is an animal. The guy loves to party, have fun, and Crack Um. Aside from being a mainstay in an extremely successful dynasty, a multi-trophy winner, and scoring the series-winner in the 2010 Stanley Cup Final, he has a wild story. He was born and raised in America, which is awesome, but that already makes for a weird start to the whole being a phenomenal hockey player thing. He has had legality issues on more than one level. The drunken conversations that would happen could absolutely not be scripted. Going shot for shot with Kaner and downing some beers would make for a great time while day drinking.

Photo: Jonathan Daniel/Getty Images

Photo: Jonathan Daniel/Getty Images

As far as the Chicago White Sox go, I would have a great time cracking open a cold one with Eloy Jimenez. Eloy just seems like such a cool, down-to-earth, good-hearted kind of guy, as exemplified by his goofy antics in the dugout and saying hello to his lovely mother every chance he gets while on television. Chuck Garfien would have to be an obvious plus-one. I’d love to discuss any and all of the prospect awards he has earned and why we are the same age and yet he’s so much richer and more successful than I am.

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As a fair-weather NFL fan, it was not the easiest choice picking a Chicago Bears player. But as an avid Sunday Funday participant, I was able to catch almost every Bears game. One name I never failed to hear was Khalil Mack. Yes, I knew of him prior to this, I was not born under a rock. Mack is a freak of nature, no doubt about it. I feel like there’s never too much drama surrounding the guy, which is always a good sign (at least for him). However, I’m in it to talk about the crazy and the fun, not necessarily the workout programs and what kind of protein he uses. I’m here for hearing why he didn’t want to give out Halloween candy to the punks of Chicago. Okay, okay, I’m being sarcastic. In all honesty, learning more about Mack would be incredible. Going from a lesser-known player at the University of Buffalo of all places to one of the most elite NFL players in recent memory has to have a damn good story behind it. The guy is a beast. You want to know what it takes to be great? Talk to Khalil Mack.

chicago bears football GIF by NFL

Max Strus is easily the go-to member of the Chicago Bulls for me. How could I not pick him? He’s a hometown kid. Growing up in the Chicagoland area and attending Stagg High School, I could’ve walked or driven past him a thousand times before. Now that he’s made it to the big boy league after killing it at DePaul, that won’t be too likely anymore. It would be incredible just to be able to talk to him about the process, the hometown friends after fame, and if he’s going to donate an entire gym to Stagg (shoutout Dwayne Wade). To have a beer with him and reminisce about walking around the Chicago Ridge mall or whatever it is would be truly awesome.

Photo: Alexa Sandler/The DePaulia

Photo: Alexa Sandler/The DePaulia

There are so many Chicago athletes I would love to just have a conversation with, let alone have a drink with, but narrowing it down to one legend and one from each of the four major sports was much more difficult than I had originally thought. Who would be your famous Chicago sports drinking buddy? Let us know in the comment section or on Twitter.

Featured Photo: Chicago Sun-Times